The thoughts

 

Photo by Vural Yavas: https://www.pexels.com/photo/depth-of-field-photography-of-tulip-flowers-1076607/

I have been thinking about the optimism in life. Can we make our own fairytale? life when our favorite person, things, activities come together when the problem might not yield as frequent as it was before. Time when we are enough with life, living with our most awareness and happiness to go through together. 

Life when activities like studying, cooking and execising is no longer an issue for our financial. Life when we have home with big window and air cooling system. Life when we can eat healthy food with sport that shape our bodies healthier. All in all, currently we are in the process to accumulate the funds to live that way, the skill to work into our dreamt job, and the family that we want to build. 

But the process though? hard. We live with our own baggage, emotionally, physically and financially. We need the resources to fulfil the gap that already there, to build our own strength to proceed life that we dreamt of. All in all, the process itself need us to be separated 3 hours differences time zone, and 12 hours flight, and different currencies to live. 

There are time when I feel bad, feeling unloved in this space and just want to grasp some love left in the air. But grasping the "left love" is also hurt. We couldn't seek love in the work, the friendship, and in the house that we live because we are separated. The love need to be grown inside us. Inside myself to feel that we are enough with our baggage and we already done our best to do our responsibilities despite the drawbacks that may hold. 

To love ourselves means that we need to fulfil our basic needs first. To heat delicious food, to work happily or to find something interesting in our daily activities, to fulfil our wants while it does not hurt anyone such as making an ice tea in a hot day, or order delivery when we are too tired to cook. 

All in all, I or we should not kept ourself from the things that sparks happiness. It was our work, our time and our skill earning this number, and this number should make our life, living. 

So that the optimism come after the self-love, right?